Secrets
by XionTheBlackRose
Summary: Why does love have to hurt? That's the first thing that comes to mind when someone asks how I'm doing. "It's not that bad." "The bruises are all accidents." "He's just drunk again, it'll be better in the morning." These are the lies I have to tell myself, and I'm a horrible liar. I know our relationship isn't the greatest, but it'll get better. It has to stop at some point, right?
1. Liar

**WARNING: This story will contain CRUDE LANGUAGE, RAPE, and SELF HARM. Read at your own risk. Thank you and enjoy.  
**

 **Xion, out**

* * *

 **Liar**

 _Is love supposed to hurt?_

Why is that the first thing that comes to mind when someone asks me how I am? Why do people have to ask anyway, it's not like I'm asking for help. Why do I have to keep reminding _him_ I'm not asking for help? He can't possibly understand. This isn't the same. It can't be. He snaps in my face, bringing me back to reality. I blink, "Uh, what?"

Roxas sighs, leaning back. His vibrant blue eyes are dark and he's staring me down, "Are you even listening to me?"

I look down, "Sorry.."

He sighs again and he reaches across the table, touching my hand, "What's on your mind, Ven?"

I pull my hands off the table and meet his eyes. His narrowed eyes and the grim line his lips have taken shows me he's not going to take my lies today. I sigh, "I'm just.. It's hard to sleep lately."

It's not an entire lie, I have been having trouble sleeping. Pretending to be asleep when Vanitas came home drunk the other night wasn't the smartest idea. Or maybe it was. I don't want to think about what would have happened if he knew I was awake the entire time. Roxas frowns, almost like he knows, "Can't sleep, huh..?"

Of course he suspects me of lying, I'm a horrible liar. And all I do is lie lately. Roxas leans back again, crossing his arms now, "Ventus, when are you going to start telling the truth?"

 _Busted._

His eyes are cold now. He's had enough. I wince, making eye contact again, "Roxas.."

I should have known this was a bad idea. I can never lie to my brother, even when we were little, he could always read my like a book. Some things just don't change. Roxas closes his eyes and shakes his head. He gets out of the booth we're sharing and I just look at him. I stare at him in confusion, "Why did you call me here?"

Roxas opens his eyes and looks away from me. He's shaking a little. I don't know what to feel about that. He looks back at me and we just stare at one another in silence for a few minutes before Roxas speaks, "Why are you still with him?"

And there's the punch line. Roxas can't stand my fiancee. I frown, "Because we're getting married in the fall?"

Roxas shakes his head, leaning over me, his hands braced on the table, "No, I mean _why_ are you still with him? You can't keep lying for him. I see the bruises you try to hide, Ven."

I've never seen him so serious before. I look away, "It was an accident."

He grabs the collar of my shirt, pulling it down, revealing the bruises on my left shoulder. He growls, "Are _these_ accidents?"

I push him and stand, adjusting my collar, "Yes."

He scoffs at me, "Why are you still covering for him? You can't honestly think he loves you?"

I shove him back, "Of course he loves me!"

He stands there, staring at me and I turn away from him, "It was good seeing you, Roxas.."

I leave the restaurant, leaving my brother standing there. I walk through the crowded street of Twilight town as the sun shines brightly. The heat is killing me, but Vanitas has the car today, and I don't have any long sleeve shirts, so this sweater has to do for now. I'll take it off and blast the air conditioner when I get home. I walk through town until I get to the apartment complex. I climb the stairs and find my apartment on the second floor.

I try to open the door and it's locked. I frown, "That's weird, I left it open when I left."

I lift the mat for the spare key and there's a note there instead. I pick up the note and groan, reading: _You were gone when I came back, so I went out to eat. You can't leave the door unlocked, we'll get robbed, stupid. I told you to wait until I got home to run errands. Have fun on the porch. ;P_ I sigh and sit down in front of the door. I sit there for a few hours before Vanitas comes up the stairs. I smile and stand quickly, "How was dinner?"

He walks up to me and ruffles my hair, smirking, "How was your afternoon on the porch?"

I shrug, pushing his hand away gently, "It's been hot."

He shrugs, taking our house key from his pocket, "And who's fault is that?"

"Mine.." I reply softly.

He nods, "That's right, so stop bitching. We go into the apartment and I lock the door behind us. He goes to the kitchen and sets two bags down on the table. I walk into our small rundown kitchen and start putting the contents of the bags away in the fridge. As I'm sorting the food in the fridge, Vanitas comes up behind me and reaches past me. He pushes me into the fridge, causing me to hit my head against the freezer door. He pulls back, holding a bottle of beer and I groan, stepping back, rubbing my head.

"Watch out, Ven," he says, "It's a small kitchen."

"Right.." I sigh, closing the fridge. He leaves the kitchen and I throw the bags in the small garbage can under the sink. I then meet Vanitas in the living room. I sit beside him on the couch and he puts his arm around me. I snuggle up against him and stare at whatever show he has on the t.v. He moves and kisses my cheek, speaking softly, "I missed you today."

I smile back, "I missed you, too."

"I love you, Ven." he says.

I lean my head on his shoulder, closing my eyes, "I love you, too."


	2. Follow Numbly

**Follow Numbly**

I sit up in bed, staring out the window at the early morning. Vanitas still sleeps next to me and I caress his hair gently. I look down at him and I smile lightly, _His features are so soft when he's asleep._ He turns over, away from me and I sigh, removing my hand from his hair. I look back out the window and watch the sun continue to rise. After awhile, I get out of bed and start cleaning up the place. I don't want Vanitas waking up to a dirty apartment, again.

Vanitas enters the kitchen awhile later, as I'm moping the floor. He smirks at me, "Who's being a good little wife?"

I frown at him, blushing lightly, "I'm not a wife."

He laughs and walks over to me. He wraps an arm around me and smashes his lips against mine, hard. Almost too hard. He pulls back a few seconds later and goes to the fridge. I cover my mouth with my hand, blushing brightly. He chuckles, "That's a good look on you, Ven."

I shake my head, dropping my hand back to the mop handle. I continue mopping as Vanitas makes a bowl of cereal. He takes it to the living room as I finish the chore. I put the mop away and make my own bowl of cereal. I meet Vanitas in the living room, where we tend to share all our meals. After breakfast, I do the small amount of dishes while Vanitas gets ready for work.

He comes up behind me and wraps his arms around my waist. I turn my head to look at him and he smiles. I smile back and he kisses me again, again too hard. He pulls back, "I'll be home around five. Stay home, there are no errands to run today."

I nod numbly, "Okay, see you then."

He kisses me again before releasing me, "Love you."

"Love you, too." I reply, waving as he leaves the apartment. I sigh and dry my hands on my shirt. I go to the bedroom and start picking up Vanitas's dirty clothes off the floor. After I get the laundry started, I return to the room and make the bed. I finally go to the living room and turn the t.v. on. Classes are out for the summer, so I don't have to worry about that, thankfully. I lean back in the couch and watch some t.v, trying to relax.

My phone starts ringing from the bedroom and I groan, getting up, "Did he forget something?"

I grab my phone off the nightstand and it surprises me that Roxas is calling. I sigh and answer, "Hello?"

"Hey, Ven, I'm sorry about yesterday." he replies, "I shouldn't have been so rude with you. I just worry about you, you have to understand that. I.. I don't want you to marry him, please, you have to call it off."

I frown, "I'm not going to call off my wedding because you don't like Vanitas."

"It's not just that I don't like him!" he sounds distressed, "Ven, please listen to me! You can't keep covering for him, I know those bruises you keep getting aren't accidents. Please, _please_.. Don't make the same mistakes I did.."

I sigh slowly, "Roxas.. Vanitas isn't-"

"Don't lie to me!" It almost sounds like he's crying now, "Please, just.. Stop lying to me."

"Roxas.." I frown, "Look, I enjoy seeing you, but if you're just going to keep going on about how Vanitas is bad for me, then just stay away from me. I love him and he loves me. We're getting married in September and I'm not going to let you stop me."

"Ventus.." his breath hitches at the end of my name.

"See you later." I hang up and set the phone back on the nightstand. I go back to the living room and sit down on the couch. I don't remember falling asleep, but I jolt awake when Vanitas slams the front door. I turn towards the doorway, "Vanitas?"

He mutters, "Shit day at work." as he roughly throws his tie off. He throws his jacket on the floor as he goes to the kitchen. He comes into the living room a moment later with a bottle of beer, and he's roughly unbuttoning his shirt. I move to the opposite end of the couch and he sits in the middle of the couch. He chugs the alcohol, still fumbling with his shirt.

I glance at him, "Would you.. Like help with your shirt?"

"Yes!" he shouts.

I wince lightly and move closer to him. I quickly finish unbuttoning his shirt. He pours beer on my head and I yelp, pulling back, "H-hey!"

I groan and stand, I need to wash this out of my hair. He grabs my hand and pulls me back onto the couch. I gasp, mostly lying on the couch now, "Vanitas, I-"

He chugs the bottle again and then throws it onto the floor, staining the tan carpet brown. He moves and pushes me fully into the couch. I stare up at him, eyes wide, "V-Vanitas..?"

He laughs, leaning down and kissing me. Hot, wet lips smash against mine with force. Forcing my mouth open, his tongue darts into my mouth. A moan escapes my throat as my tongue dances with his. His grip on my shoulders tighten, causing me to wince. I close my eyes tight as teeth scrape my bottom lip. He moves, allowing me to breathe. In one motion, my shirt is lying on the floor. He leans down again and his mouth attacks my neck. I yelp and shudder as a wave of pleasure runs through me. That pleasure quickly mingles with pain as he bites and sucks his way down my throat. This time, his name escapes in a moan and I can hear him chuckle, "Tell me you want it."


	3. Hurt and Betrayed

**WARNING: This chapter contains rape. You've been warned. Read at your own risk. The story's rated M for this reason. Don't forget to review, I like seeing feedback.**

* * *

 **Hurt and Betrayed**

I squirm beneath him, sex is the last thing I want. I told him I don't want to get that intimate with him until we're married. He's drunk and angry, and I neglect him. This is my own fault. I should have known this was coming. I shoot him down every time he tries to touch me below the waist. He usually listens, he must have snapped now. Maybe it'll hurt less if I tell him what he wants to hear.

His mouth continues to attack me and I feel him tug on my pants. I shake, fear builds in my chest. I want to push him away, but I'm afraid of what he'll do if I do that. Another moan escapes me and I close my eyes, "I.. I want it.."

It takes virtually three seconds to undress me and I'm lying naked on the couch with my fiancee straddling me, taking his own clothes off. I look away, fixating my gaze on the wall across from me. I'd rather look anywhere but at Vanitas. I don't want to see the look in his eyes. I don't want to see any of what I'm allowing to happen. I gasp as I feel his grab my legs. I look at him as he hooks my legs over his shoulders. Realizations hits me then, what exactly is happening. I'm going to lose my virginity, and he's drunk. This isn't what I wanted my first time to be like.

I imagined soft romantic foreplay and kind words, maybe some nice wine, a fancy dinner. Hell, I wanted freaking rose petals to fall around us, but this is nothing like that. This is forced, and uncomfortable, and I feel like I'm going to throw up. The alcohol on his breath makes things even worse, because it's a constant reminder that he isn't in his right mind.

 _I can still tell him to stop, I can_ \- He thrusts into me and pain fills my entire being. I feel like I'm being ripped in half. The pain causes me to scream and Vanitas covers my mouth with his hand, "Shh.. It'll be better if you just be still."

He keeps thrusting with such force, I feel like my insides are being shredded by a cheese grater. I continue to scream and my cries of pain are thoroughly muffled by his hand clamped tightly on my jaw. After awhile the pain sort of subsides. Now I'm just numb. He doesn't stop. He turns me over and I face the wall as he rips me apart again. I blink slowly, moans and whimpers leave my mouth, but I don't scream anymore. It's a dull pain. I came twice already, but he's still hard. I hear him moaning and grunting in my ear and I wince. Please, just stop soon.

He finally comes inside me and I shudder. It's the worst feeling, I feel so dirty. It's gross, I don't want to think about it. I just want to take a shower. He pulls out and I whimper. He sighs and stands, stretching. I sit up slowly, I know I'm going to have to clean this mess up. I look up at him, "I'm going to take a shower.. Then I'll.. Clean this up.."

He nods, "I need a shower, too. You start cleaning while I get my shower."

He heads to the bathroom and I sigh, standing up. Pain shoots up my body and I grip the arm of the couch so I don't fall down, groaning. I slowly clean the living room. I pick up Vanitas's beer bottle and put it in the fridge since it's still half full. I grab a sponge from the kitchen and soak it with soap. I clean the rug where the beer spilled, and then I try to clean up the couch. Vanitas comes out of the bathroom, wearing just pajama bottoms. He smiles at me, "Good job, Ven. Fuck, I'm going to have such a hang over tomorrow."

I nod limply, "I'm done now, so I'm.. Going to shower. I'm not feeling too well, so.. I'm going to bed after my shower."

He nods, turning on the t.v., "Night, babe."

"Night.." I go limp my way to the bedroom. I grab a t shirt, underwear, and a pair of sweatpants then I set the water and get in the shower. I just stand in the shower, letting the hot water run down my body for awhile. I slowly start to wash myself off then and once I'm done, I just start crying. I sit in the tub and pull my knees to my chest. I sit there in the hot water, and I cry. I can't stop crying. I feel hurt, and betrayed. It's my fault, it wouldn't have hurt so much if I had just let him have sex with me one of the first few times he asked.

He'll probably ask for it more often now, and I'm not sure I'm okay with that. I want romance, not drunken fucking. I hurt all over, he was just so rough with me. Maybe he'll be more gentle next time. Yeah, he has to be. This was an exception, he was just in a bad mood. He seems much more happy now that I've given myself to him. I'll just have sex with him again the next time he asks, and he'll be more gentle. I'll get my romantic fantasy, for sure. He loves me after all, he doesn't really want to hurt me.

I calm down and get out of the shower. I gingerly dry off and get dressed. I go to the bedroom and turn off the light and get in bed. I pull the covers over me and I face the wall. I can hear Vanitas's obnoxious laughter from whatever show he's watching. I sigh and close my eyes. I just want to sleep. I'm sure I'll feel better in the morning. I'll make Vanitas breakfast and he'll thank me for taking care of him while he's hung over. Everything will be fine in the morning.


	4. Contribute

**Contribute**

"God, I'm so hung over!" Vanitas comes into the kitchen as I finish setting the table.

I smile lightly at him, "You're up early.."

He groans, a hand pressed to his forehead, "Yeah, well, I smelled your fantastic cooking."

He grins at me and I blush, gesturing to the table, "You don't have work today, so.. I figured we could.. Have breakfast together today.."

He sits at the table, "Awesome. Get me something to drink, will 'ya, babe?"

I nod and limp over to the fridge. I grab a Coke and go back to the table. I hand it to him and my eyes widen lightly when I see he's staring at me. He takes the can and tilts his head to the left, "You okay, Venni?"

I look away, sitting beside him, "Y-yeah, just.. A little sore is all."

"Sore?" the confusion in his voice makes my heart drop into my stomach, "Why are you sore?"

 _He doesn't remember.. He doesn't know he ra-we had sex._ I shake my head, "Um.. I just slept on my leg wrong, that's all.."

I shouldn't have lied. I need to tell him what happened.

"And the bruise on your shoulder there?" He points and I quickly pull my sleeve up. _My clothes are too big lately._

I sigh, "Uh.. You.. Did that.."

He frowns, "Uh, no, I didn't. I would remember."

I close my eyes, almost whispering, "You were drunk last night.."

He remains silent, so I keep talking. I tell him what happened; how he said work was bad, how he was drinking, then how he rap-we had sex. I told him we had sex. I open my eyes and peak a glance at him. He's expressionless. It kind of scares me. He sighs then, looking annoyed. He rubs the back of his head, "Fuck, I took your virginity and I don't even remember it. Fuck! Fuck!"

He slams his fist on the table and I wince. He groans then he looks at me, "I thought you didn't want sex until we're married? Why let me fuck you while I'm drunk?"

I look away again, "You.. Were so angry about work.. You asked to.. Have sex and.. I thought it would help you calm down, so.. I.. Said yes.."

I hear the chair move and I look up. Vanitas stands beside me now. I look up at him and his eyes are cold, "You said yes.. Because I was angry?"

"Y-yes.." I swallow. I don't like his eyes. When his eyes get like that, he hurts me.

"You're afraid of me, aren't you, Ventus?" his cold eyes narrow and I gasp, "N-no! Of course not!"

He chuckles humorlessly, "Then why are you shaking right now?"

My eyes widen, I hadn't noticed I started shaking. He leans down and grips my shoulders, hard, "Are you on board with your brother now? Going to call off the wedding now?"

"N-no," I whimper, "I'm not leaving you. I love you, I want to be with you."

"Then why do you look so scared?!" he screams, shoving me back. The chair tips over and I hit the floor. I roll off the chair and sit up slowly. He grabs a fist full of my hair and I groan as he kneels beside me. He pulls my head back to look at him and he growls, "I'm angry now, Ven. Gonna let me fuck you now, Ven?"

I feel tears come to my eyes, "V-Vanitas.. Please.. Calm down.."

"No," he shoves me against the floor and he straddles my waist, "I never wanted to fuck you before, I was going to wait for our wedding night, but you never even let me kiss you half the time! And any foreplay is against your rules, right? You never act like my boyfriend, you act like a house guest! I pay for your school, I pay for our apartment! And what do you give me in return? You can't even clean the house right!"

He leans down and growls in my face, "I pay, you need to contribute."

"I-I'll get a job.." I reply.

He shakes his head and smiles slowly, "No you won't."

I swallow, "What.. Do you want me to do then..?"

He moves so he's sitting beside me and he grabs my hair again. He pulls my head towards his crotch. He laughs, "Contribute."

* * *

I lie in bed next to him and he sits up, smirking, "You scream a lot."

I don't reply and he frowns, "Don't give me the silent treatment, Ven." he grins then, "On second thought, do. Your mouth is better used when you don't talk."

I shiver and look away, "What do you want for lunch..?"

He moves and whispers in my ear, "You."

I get out of the bed, heading for the door, "I'll make sandwiches or something.."

"Ven," his voice stops me at the door.

I turn back slowly, "Yes..?"

"I'm not hungry. Get back in bed." he says.

"But, I'm hung-" he cuts me off, "Get back in bed, Ven. Don't make me put you in bed myself."

I wince and go back to the bed. As I get on the bed, he grabs my arm and pulls me down. He moves and gets over me. He moves and wraps a hand around my penis. He starts pumping me and I squirm, moaning. He grins, "See? It feels good. Let me make you feel good, Ven."

"Please, stop.." I beg.

He leans down and kisses and sucks my neck, getting more moans from me. He chuckles, "You like this and you know it."

A tear runs down my face and I make a sound between a whimper and a moan, "V-Vanitas.."

He kisses my neck again, pumping me faster, "Say my name again."

I start to full on cry as I feel myself getting hard. Vanitas looks at me and he's grinning, "Your body doesn't lie, Venni. You want this, I think it's time you stop lying."

He keeps pumping me and grip the sheets. It does feel good, but I don't want it to. My body is betraying me again. Will it ever stop? I keep crying as the pressure builds and I feel like I'm going to lose it. He gets the reaction he wants and he laughs. I press my hands against his shoulders, begging him, "Please, please stop. I'm sorry I got scared last night, it won't happen again."


	5. Just Keep Lying

**Just Keep Lying**

I sit on the couch, staring blankly at the t.v. Vanitas left for work an hour ago, and I cleaned the house. Now I'm just sitting here, wondering how the hell my fiancee is so angry, and what I did to cause it. He wasn't like this when we started dating. He used to be calm, caring, and sweet. What happened? What did I do to make him this way? I'm pulled from my thoughts when someone knocks on the door. I get up and wince as pain shoots through my body briefly. I limp to the door and when I open it, my eyes widen, "R-Roxas..?"

He smiles lightly, "Hey, Ven. He at work?"

"Yeah.." I reply.

He nods, "Good. Can I come in?"

I blink, "What?"

He gestures inside, "Can I come in?"

"Uh, I'm not supposed to have people over while Vanitas is at work." I state.

He frowns, "Okay.. Do you want to come to lunch with me, then? We can go wherever you want. I just want to talk."

"I.. I'm not supposed to leave the apartment.. While he's.. At work.." I look away.

Roxas cross his arms, "He doesn't let you do anything, does he? Ven, you're twenty-one. You're a grown man, he can't tell you what you can and can't do."

I don't reply and Roxas sighs, dropping his arms to his sides, "If you don't want to go out, that's fine. But can I please come in? I haven't seen you in weeks. He doesn't let you come see me either, does he?"

"He's afraid.. You'll convince me to.. Call off the wedding.." I rub my left arm, sudden pain shooting up my arm. The bruises on my arms are always so sensitive.

"And once you're married? Will he let me see you then?" His eyes turn hard, narrowed. I don't fear Roxas's eyes when they get like that, though. Roxas's anger isn't pointed at me. I never get scared of my brother. I shouldn't have to be scared of my fiancee either. I promised him I wouldn't be scared of him. I do everything he says and he won't hurt me. Well, the sex hurts, but it doesn't last that long.

"I don't.. Know.. I'm sure we'll get to see each other, though.. You're going to be my best m-" he cuts me off, "I'm not coming to that wedding. I won't watch you sell your life away with that _man_."

My eyes widen and I stare at him, "You're not.. Coming to my _wedding_..?"

He frowns, "Don't look at me like that. You _know_ why I don't like him, Ven."

"He's not-" he cuts me off again, "Don't lie to me. You don't have to lie anymore, Ven. You never had to lie. I know what's going on. How could you think I wouldn't, considering what I went through last year?"

I swallow and his eyes narrow, "Your shoulder.. He did that, right?"

I quickly pull my collar up to hide the bruise that resembles a hand. Roxas's eyes soften a little, "You're clothes are getting too big for you.."

It was just a statement, but I can hear the pain in his words. Even after a few months of gaining his weight back, his clothes still don't fit right. My clothes are always practically falling off me. He shivers and he crosses his arms, "Ven, tell me what happened last year. Tell me everything that happened."

I stare at him in confusion, "Why?"

He sighs, "Please, just do it. Maybe if you say the similarities out loud, it might.. Help you see through your own delusions."

I frown, "Okay.. Last year.. You started dating.. That guy.."

"Terra," he clarifies.

I nod slowly, "Right.. You started dating Terra.. You, um.. You were happy at first, and then.. You started to change. You started being less energetic, less.. Social. I remember you locked yourself in your room a lot. You also stopped.. Eating.. You would get bruises and tell Dad and I they were all from practice, or by accident.. We believed you, too. You were such a good liar, always was.."

I close my eyes, shaking. I know what he's doing, "You were always so sad, I'd hear you crying from my room. The bruises.. Were getting worse, you refused to eat, I remember I literally had to force feed you dinner once.."

"Continue." his voice is cold, he's remembering, too.

I open my eyes, "You went to the hospital a lot.. Dad never told me why, but.. I've seen the scars on your arms."

"That's right," he tilts his head back slightly, "Being with him was literally killing me. I know how upset you were when you figured it out. I know how angry you were every time I went back to him. Every time you tried to stop me. So, tell me, Ven? What makes this so different? Are you going to wait until you're almost dead inside and out, too before you do something about it?"

I suddenly bursts into tears. Roxas moves and wraps his arms around me. I grip his shirt as I sob into his shoulder. He rubs my back gently, silently. We stand like that for awhile until the tears stop. I want to tell him everything now. Everything I should have told him from the beginning. But I love Vanitas. I want him to go back to the way he was. I know if I wait long enough and do as he says, I'll get the Vanitas I fell in love with back. I'm sure of it.

I finally stop crying and step back. He drops his arms to his sides and his eyes are full of pain and misery, "Ven.. Don't you see what's happening? Do you see what you're doing to yourself? You've lost so much weight, don't think I haven't noticed. And the way you act so jumpy when anyone puts their hands near you? I know what causes that. You know I do. Ventus, I need to hear it from you. Is he hitting you?"

I stare at him, I'm so conflicted. I want to tell the truth, I ache to tell the truth. But I'm afraid of what will happen when I do. I don't want to get Vanitas in trouble. I don't want Roxas to fight for me. I don't want Roxas to get hurt. I'd rather get hurt than let him. I want to be a good big brother again, but I can't. I'm not good enough. He's so much stronger than me, emotionally and physically. I know he can take care of himself. He keeps staring at me, waiting for me to say what he knows is true. I want to say it, but I can't make my mouth speak the words I need.

I swallow my fear and speak another lie, "No."


	6. Differences

**Differences**

Roxas is suddenly livid and he shoves me. I fall to the floor and when I look back up at him, he's crying, he's angry and he's crying. And it's my fault. His body shakes and he shakes his head, clenching his fists, "Stop lying! Just _stop!_ "

He comes in and drops to his knees beside me. He leans over and hugs me tightly, "Please, _please_.. Just stop lying.."

"Roxas.." it hurts to say his name. This scene is so familiar, but I was on Roxas's end. I know what he's trying to show me, and I know I'm refusing to see it. How long do you have to believe your own delusions before they become real? How long can I ignore this pain in my heart and on my body? How much is too much anymore? How much longer can I keep going like this?

"Please, just tell me the truth, Ven. I can _protect_ you, you can stay with Axel and I as long as you need to.. You don't have to isolate yourself. I've talked to your friends, they haven't heard from you since you and Vanitas got together. I know what he's preparing for you, and _trust_ me, you don't want it.."

"What.. Are you talking about..?" I'm genuinely curious. Roxas never gave specific details on what went on when he was alone with Terra. Did he have to contribute, too?

Roxas pulls back and he's still crying. He shudders, "Ven.. Please, I'm _begging_ you. Just come home with me. Let me _protect_ you. Let me do what _you_ did for me. Don't let him kill what's left of your innocence."

At the mention of innocence, I start laughing. Tears start streaming down my face and I can't stop laughing and crying, " _Innocence?_ He already took that!"

Roxas's eyes widen and his breath hitches, "What..?"

My laughing tuns to sobs and he clenches his fists, "He raped you?"

"I didn't want to say yes," I cry, "I was just scared!"

Before I can stop myself, I'm telling him everything. All the fights, all the beatings, all the contributing I have to do, everything. Roxas sits there and listens. I can't read his expression. He stands slowly, and then he pulls me to my feet. He pulls me out of the apartment, "That's it. You're coming home with me. I'm not letting you stay another second with him."

He's seething now, "I swear, I'm going to smash his face in for hurting you like that. He has no right to treat you like a prostitute."

"Roxas.." I'm still crying and he sighs, wiping the tears from my face. He smiles softly, "Don't worry, Ven. I'm going to keep you safe. Come on."

He takes my hand and leads me down to the parking lot. We walk up to his car and get in. The drive back to his house is silent and tense. Roxas is still obviously angry, and I'm just afraid of what will happen when Vanitas gets home and I'm not there. We pull into the drive way and I get out. I stare at his house for a moment, I've never actually been to his house. He smiles lightly and gestures for me to follow him inside.

I go in and the living room is the first thing I see. The walls are a nice white, and the floor has pretty hardwood floors. There's a couch by the far wall on the left and a recliner towards the center of the room. A lone marble coffee table sits between the recliner and the couch and on the wall behind me is a large flat screen t.v. It's so much nicer than the standard junk t.v. I bought at a yard sale a few months ago.

"Sit down and relax, I'm going to tell Axel you're staying with us for awhile." Roxas leaves, heading to the kitchen, which lies just beyond the living room. It's a standard kitchen, but they have nice marble counters and cabinets. I see Axel at the stove, he's cooking something. I sit in the recliner and lean over the arm, trying to watch them. I ignore the screaming of my ribs and watch my brother approach his boyfriend.

Roxas taps Axel's shoulder. Axel looks at him and smiles. He leans down and gives Roxas a quick kiss. Roxas crosses his arms, speaking softly, "I brought my brother."

Axel tilts his head, still smiling, "Great. It's been forever since I've seen him. Does he like steak? Cause that's what's for dinner. I'll throw another one on the burner."

"Axel.." Roxas's voice holds warning.

Axel frowns, instantly picking it up, "What happened?"

Roxas looks back at me and he looks slightly surprised to see me spying. I wave lightly and he waves back. he turns back to Axel, "Remember when I told you about Terra?"

Axel nods, "That scumbag that beat you? Yeah, what about him."

"It's not.. Specifically about him, but.. Ven.."

He stands on his tip toes and whispers in Axel's ear. Axel turns to me and his expression changes. He looks upset and angry, like Roxas did. He quickly smiles, "You like steak, Ven?"

I nod slowly, "Medium rare.."

The tension in the house is suffocating, but it's not like at home. At least I can still breathe here. Roxas turns Axel back to face him, "I'm letting him stay with us for now."

Axel nods, "Yeah, that's fine. But what are we going to do when his fiancee comes for him?"

Roxas's eyes turn to stones, "He's not touching Ven again."

Axel hugs Roxas, "Damn right he's not. I'll have his ass thrown off our property if he even steps onto the lawn."

I turn back around and stare at the wall. Just from watching them for a short few minutes, I already see all the differences that I want in my relationship. Axel is gentle and caring, Vanitas is rough and mean. Roxas gets to touch Axel and there's no yelling. I even look at Vanitas in a way he deems weird, there's pain. When Axel kissed Roxas, there didn't seem to be pain for Roxas there. Every time Vanitas kisses me it kind of hurts. I want Vanitas to go back to the way he _used_ to be. I want him to love me and be _nice_ about it. I don't want any more yelling and pain. I don't want to see those eyes I _fear_. I don't want _this_ Vanitas, but I love him and I can't help it. I'm _missing_ him.


	7. Destroying Myself

**Destroying Myself**

We sit in the living room, I'm still in their recliner and Roxas and Axel sit together on the couch. We eat our dinner while watching t.v. I'm not paying attention to whatever's on, I'm just eating my food and waiting for my phone to ring. Vanitas should be home any minute and he won't like it when he finds I'm not there. The next second my phone starts ringing. _I knew it._ I an feel Roxas and Axel looking at me. I pull my phone from my pocket and Vanitas's name is flashing as the phone rings. I take a deep breath and answer, "Hello?"

"Where are you?" the anger in his voice is painfully apparent.

"I'm at Roxas's.. We're having dinner." I reply.

"I thought I told you to stay home while I'm gone. You didn't even ask if you could go." he states.

"Hang up." Roxas says.

"We're just having dinner," I try to justify myself and he yells, "I don't care! Get your ass back home, now!"

I wince, "Just a little longer?"

I sound like a kid wanting to stay up late. I'm pathetic. Roxas moves and puts his food on the table and he walks up to me. He holds out his hand for my phone. I don't want to give it to him.

"Get home, now, Ven. If I have to come get you, you won't like what happens." Vanitas growls.

I close my eyes, whispering through the anxiety choking me, "I have to go, Roxas."

Roxas snatches the phone from me, "I know what you did, and you're stupid as hell if you think I'd let you come near him again!"

Roxas's face continues to twist in anger, "He doesn't belong to you."

I watch him as his body starts to shake. Roxas growls, "Like hell that gives you the right to use him like that! He's a fucking person!"

I've never heard Roxas cuss much, he hates the words "fucking" and "fuck." It surprises me to hear him talk like that. I've never seen him so angry. He continues to scream into my phone, "You call that sick pleasure love?! You like beating up weak people, treating them like nothing, Terra?!"

He shakes and closes his eyes, "Shut your mouth. You don't know what you're talking about."

"Roxas.." I hate seeing him so upset because of me, I reach for the phone and he pushing my hand back down.

"Sh-shut up!" tears form in Roxas's eyes.

I stand and put my plate in the chair. I take the phone from him. He stares at me with wide eyes. I watch a tear fall down his face as I put the phone to my ear, "Vanitas."

Vanitas chuckles, "Come home, Ven. Don't make this worse than it has to be."

"I'm on my way." I reply.

"Ven, no!" Roxas cries, "You can't just go back to him like that!"

I end the call and put my phone in my pocket, "Thanks for dinner."

"Ventus!" he grabs my arm, "Don't go.."

I look away, "I'm sorry."

I pull away from him and walk out the door. He comes after me, "Wait! You know he'll just hurt you if you go back!"

I know he will. But I can't help it. I'm in love with him. There's nothing else I can do. I just have to take my punishment and hope he forgives me. I keep walking and Roxas runs in front of me, stopping me. Tears run down his face and he takes my shoulders with shaking hands, "Ventus.. Please.. Don't go back to him. I don't want to see you get hurt. Ventus, you _know_ this. He's not going to change!"

"I'm sorry, Roxas." I walk past him, "But I love him."

I leave my brother standing in the middle of the street as I walk home. It takes me awhile to get home, it's dark out when I get to the apartment complex. I slowly, dreadfully walk up the stairs. I get to the door and a part of me doesn't want to open it. I'm ruining myself. I open the door and go inside. Vanitas is pacing the kitchen and I close the door as his eyes zero in on me. He walks up and slams me against the door, "Trying to run away, Venni?"

"No.." I reply softly, "I just went to have dinner. I hadn't seen him in awhile."

He growls, drawing a hand back. He punches me in the face and I yelp, falling to the floor. I look up at him as tears run down my face. He glares down at me, "You're never leaving this fucking house again, do you understand?"

"But.. When school starts up.." I whimper.

"Never. Leaving." he kicks me twice, for each word. He doesn't stop. He keeps kicking me and I put my hands up to cover my face. He keeps kicking me over and over. Immense pain flares in my chest and stomach, already bearing fresh bruises from yesterday. I know more bruises will appear. He stops kicking me and then he grabs my hair, pulling me back to my feet. I cry, looking into his cold eyes. The eyes I fear so much. He drags me to the kitchen counter and he grabs a knife. My eyes widen and he turns back to me. He holds it out to me, speaking softly, but I hear the anger still, "You hate me so much? Show me how much I hurt you. Go on, do it. Do what your pathetic, slut brother did. Cut yourself."

Something inside me snaps when he mentions my brother. I take the knife and I stare at it. I shake, asking, "What.. Did you call.. My brother..?"

He smirks, "That hit a nerve, Venni? You're brother is a pathetic slut."

"That's what i thought you said.." so many things run through my mind. Hurting me is fine, but don't talk about my brother like that. I try to stab him and he grabs my wrist before I can do any damage. I drop the knife and he pushes me to the ground. He picks up the knife and he starts cutting my arm. I scream and try to push him away with my free hand, but I can't make him move. He keeps cutting me and I start to see spots in my vision. My vision soon becomes blurry, and then the pain numbs as I lose consciousness.


	8. Give Up

**Give Up**

When I wake up I don't know how long I've been asleep. I stare at the familiar ceiling of my bedroom. I hold my right arm up, and there's bandages covering the cuts Vanitas made on me. I look around and find I'm alone in the room. The bedroom door is closed. I get out of the bed slowly and walk up to the door. I try to open it and the door is locked. I frown at the handle, _It's different than before._ The lock used to be on the inside. My eyes widen, "He locked me in.."

I go the the window and there's now bars covering the outside. My heart sinks. He wasn't kidding. He's never going to let me leave. I shake and drop to the floor as despair wraps around my heart. I'm truly a prisoner now, and I did it to myself. I start to cry and I search my pockets for my phone. Of course he took it. I gasp and stand as the door opens. Vanitas closes the door and he doesn't look happy. I shake, trying to stop crying, "V-Vanitas.."

"I don't want to hear your voice." he growls, shoving me onto the bed. He climbs on top of me and grabs my chin, "You tell your brother I treat you like a prostitute?"

"N-no!" I gasp, "I-I just.."

He smacks me in the face and I gasp. He grabs my throat, "You want to tell lies, Venni? Fine. You say I treat you like a prostitute? I'll treat you like a fucking prostitute."

I try to pry his hand from my neck, "P-please.."

He hits me again, "Did I say you could talk?"

I stare at him with wide eyes, I didn't want to die before, but now I do. I'm such an idiot. I'm in love with a monster. The man I fell in love with is gone, or maybe he never existed. He's going to hurt me, he's going to rape me. There's not going to be anything left of me when he's done. I'm going to spend the rest of my life in this room, treated like a sex toy. Maybe that's what I am.

Maybe that's all I ever was to him. All of this realization is too late. I've dug my grave too deep to get back out. My brother was right, he's always right. I knew it from the moment it started. I knew the signs to look out for and I let them pass me with blind eyes. I let this happen to myself, and for what? Love? This isn't love. This is sick, and sad. What Roxas has with Axel is love. And that's something I'm never going to get. Not now, not ever.

I can cry, I can beg, it won't change a thing. Vanitas will never stop, I know that now. I knew it all along. Why did I choose to let this happen? Because I believed in a dream. The man I met doesn't exist. The man I love doesn't exist. I'm in love with a phantom. I'm worse than Roxas. He figured it all out while he could still leave. I kept my delusions despite everything I knew was wrong, but I did it anyway.

It's too late for me to get out of this. I don't want to do this anymore. I don't want to be alive if this is what I have to live with. My pain will never end, and I did it to myself. All of this violence and rape, it's my fault. Everything is my fault. I used to be the strong one, I used to be the one screaming at my brother's abuser. I used to be the one comforting him, taking care of him. He tried to do that for me and I brushed aside because I'm an idiot. However long ago it was that I had dinner with Roxas, that was the last chance for me to escape, and like every other chance, I threw that away, too.

* * *

I sit up when I hear Roxas's voice. I get out of bed, wincing as I move. So many new bruises cover my entire body. I press my ear to the door, trying to listen.

"Where the hell is he?!" Roxas screams.

"That's none of your business." Vanitas replies.

"I'm his brother! It's all of my business!" Roxas says.

"You need to leave." Vanitas growls.

"Not without my brother!" Roxas replies.

Here's my last chance of escape. He just needs to know where I am. Then he can get help. I bang my fists against the door, screaming, "Roxas, I'm in here!"

I hear Vanitas laughing and I step away from the door as I see the handle moving. Vanitas opens the door, holding up my phone. My eyes widen when I see it's playing a recording. My heart shatters. Roxas isn't here. Vanitas is just tormenting me. I shove him but he doesn't move very much. He continues to laugh as the recording continues to play. I cry, "Why are you doing this to me?! I loved you!"

" _Loved?_ " Vanitas clicks his tongue as he steps into the room, shoving me to the floor. He closes the door and stops the recording. He puts my phone in his pocket, "You _loved_ me, Venni?"

I shiver and he smirks, "What? You don't love me anymore? But we're getting married tomorrow."

My eyes widen, "What? How long did I sleep for?"

"You were almost comatose, I might have gone a little crazy with the cutting, but that doesn't matter. I patched you up and you're fine now." Vanitas replies.

I sob, "Please, let me go.."

"And lose my wonderful husband? I don't think so. Now get back on the bed, unless you want me to fuck you on the floor." he says.

I continue to sob as I get up and climb on to the bed. He undresses and then gets on the bed, climbing on top of me. He pins my hands down and starts sucking and biting my neck, leaving teeth marks on my skin. Each movement he makes makes me whimper and cry. He doesn't care about my discomfort. This is my punishment for trying to leave him. I should have left a long time ago. I don't know how long I can take this new kind of abuse. I didn't want to die before, but I want to die now.


	9. I'm Sorry, Goodbye

**I'm Sorry, Goodbye**

"You can't make me marry you!" I scream, throwing my brush at his head. He dodges the brush with a chuckle, "Oh, poor Venni, I don't have to make you. You're going to marry me, and of your own free will. And do you know why?"

I shake, backing against the wall as he approaches me. He puts a hand on my face and I look away. He leans in and kisses my cheek, whispering in my ear, "Because you love me. I love you, too, you know. I don't want to be like this, but you don't give me a choice."

I shove him, "I won't believe your lies anymore!"

He sighs and shakes his head, holding my bare shoulders against the wall, "Do we have to keep doing this? Do you know how hard it's going to be to hide all these pesky bruises in the morning?"

"Pesky..?" I sob, "You're the one doing this to me!"

Everything inside me screams to run or screams to fight. I'm mixed up and I just want this to stop. One thing I know for sure is that I don't want to marry him, not anymore. I've fully woken myself up, but it doesn't help. The easy thing to do is to give in, to just do what he wants. Go back to believing he'll stop once he gets what he wants. To go back to sleep in my mind, go back to the lie and forget the nightmare I'm living while I wait for death to take me, because I know it will soon if this continues. Every part of me hurts, there's not much of my body that's untouched by his abuse. My eyes remain puffy and red from the crying. My left eye is now swollen and black because Vanitas punched me around twenty minutes ago.

He takes me into his arms, holding me close. A part of me still wants to believe the lie he's about to tell. I don't understand why he's being so moody. He's been nothing but cruel to me since I woke up in here, and now he's suddenly changing his game? He's trying to confuse me, he has to be. He knows I won't marry him now, so why is he still trying? _Why not just kill me?_

I sob against him and he stands silently, holding me. The anticipation is killing me. I know he's going to be cruel to me again any moment. I don't like this. I just want to leave. _Wait.. Maybe.._ I move slowly, gently pushing out of his arms. _He'll probably see through this, but I have to try.._ I look up at him and his eyes are cold, but his features are soft. _He's confusing._ I swallow slowly, "Vanitas.. Can we.. Make a deal..?"

He blinks slowly, "A deal? What are you talking about?"

"You want me to marry you, right? Without fighting back..?" I just have to say this right..

He nods, crossing his arms. His eyes narrow. I continue, "I'll.. I'll marry you, just.. Let me talk to Roxas. Please.. Just let me talk to him and I'll marry you, I won't complain about anything for the rest of my life, I promise.."

 _Please.. Please.. Just give me the phone.._ He looks thoughtful for a moment. I'm preparing for him to deny my request. I wait for several minutes, just watching him. He finally nods and I breathe out in relief. He takes my phone from his pocket and hands the phone to me. I instantly dial 9-1-1 and when someone answers, I scream into the phone, "Help me! My fiance's beating me, he's going to kill me!"

"Ven!" Vanitas roars, snatching the phone. He ends the call and then punches me in the face, knocking me to the floor. He starts kicking me and I roll under the bed, crying, "Please, just let me go!"

He growls, walking around the bed, "You really messed up, Ventus. If I can't have you, no one will."

I hear him walk across the room, I hear him rummage through something roughly. I hide under the bed, shaking and crying. What's he going to do to me now? Something is suddenly thrown under the bed and I gasp as the lit match catches the cover on fire. I hear Vanitas's footsteps leave and the door slams. I get out from under the bed and run to the door. I try the nob and it's locked. I hit on the door, "Stop it, let me out!"

I turn around and gasp, finding multiple lit matches around the room. The carpet is on fire, the bed is catching on fire, the clothes in the closet are burning, the curtains have caught on fire. I can't put all this out.. I shudder and start crying again, "Oh, god, he's going to kill me!"

I turn back to the door and hit it repeatedly with all the strength I can muster. I scream and cry, assaulting the door as the fire spreads. My chest tightens as panic and lack of oxygen sets in. The fire roars and starts to travel up the walls. He might have splashed gasoline around the room, I don't know. All I know is the room is burning fast and I won't be far behind it. I leave the door and try to open the window. The window won't budge and there's bars on the outside. I'll never get out that way. I move away from the window, fire is covering the entire curtains now.

I back into the corner by the door and I draw my knees to my chest, coughing violently as the smoke starts to really suffocate me. I can't get out of here, I shouldn't have called the police. I should have called Roxas, and told him goodbye. I should have told him I'm sorry.. I cough, shuddering. The smoke burns my eyes and I close them, tears still trail down my face.

"Roxas.." I cough, my voice strains from the intake of the rising smoke, "I.. I'm sorry.. I sh-"

I cough violently, dry heaving. I shudder, "I should have.. L-listened to you.. You were right.. You.. Were a-" I continue choking on my words, "Always right.. I ignored my pain.. I ignored your suffering.. I was.. W.. W-was.. S-selfish. I.. I knew it.. H-hurt you.. To s-see.. ... T-to ...S-s.. S-s-se..ee.."

I'm coughing too much to speak, the smoke is so thick, I can barely see what's around me. I'm getting dizzy, I see spots behind my eyelids. The lights in the closet and on the bedside table burst and the fire cackles. It's laughing at me. It's ready to eat me up, like it's eating my room, my prison. I slowly lay on the floor, coughing and gagging. My head hurts and my body feels heavy and limp. The lack of oxygen is getting to me. At least at this rate, it'll be the smoke that kills me. I don't want to be alive when the fire turns my body to ash.

What will be buried at my funeral? With so much ash in this room, how will they know which ash belongs to me? Will some of me be buried with the ash of the covers or the curtains, even the clothes? Or will I not even be buried? They'll bury the ash of inanimate objects while my ashes are swept or vacuumed away as this house gets demolished a few days after the fire?

I'm going to die. I can.. Feel it. My body is cold, even though the room is on fire. I blink slowly and the more I blink, the less I actually see. My vision is blurring and all I see are moving shapes of orange and gray. This is it. I can't breathe, my lungs heave and constrict, trying to find air to push out. I think my body is shutting down, I can hear my heart beat in my ears. I close my eyes, hopefully for the last time, _Roxas.. I'm sorry.. Goodbye..  
_


	10. Maybe One Day

**Maybe One Day**

I force heavy eyelids open and I'm blinded by white light. I can hear someone crying, and various beeps echoing around my head. Everything hurts, but I think I'm still alive. My vision clears and I can see past the blinding light. I am in a hospital room with various machines hooked up to me, the beeping is too loud and it hurts my ears. The crying is soft, but it hurts my heart. I'm alone in the room save for two people.

Axel is sitting across from me and he has his arms around Roxas, who's crying into Axel's chest, clinging to him. Roxas's soft sobbing hurts worse than any bruise Vanitas ever put on my body. I don't care that Vanitas beat me, I don't care that he raped, I don't care that he tried to kill me. I care that by allowing the abuse to get as bad as it did, I hurt my baby brother. After everything we've been through, after how hard I worked to get him from Terra, it must have been a kick in his heart to have to watch me fall victim to the same fate he had.

But I made it worse, because I knew what was happening before hand and I still let it happen. I didn't try to fight it. And that's what hurt him. My ignorance, my suffering, it hurt him so much worse than it ever hurt me. I don't deserve his support, his kindness, his love. He doesn't deserve to feel the pain of what I let happen to me. _Roxas, I'm sorry._

Axel's eyes move and meet mine. He gasps and nudges Roxas. Roxas looks up at him, then he turns to me. His face is pale, his eyes are dark and swollen red from the tears he's still crying. The tears run down his face, his hair is even more messy than he usual styled mess. His clothes are disheveled and he looks exhausted. I don't dare smile at him. Not now, not like this. I part my lips, I try to choke his name out my throat, but all that leaves my lips is a pained groan. Roxas shakes his head, standing, "Don't talk."

I close my mouth, frowning lightly. I look down and that's when I notice I can't see my skin. Every inch of me that I can see is wrapped in bandages. I can feel the bandages on my face as well. Roxas walks up to me and kneels by the bed, so we're eye level. He smiles softly and I want to cry. He shouldn't be smiling at me, he should be angry. He breathes out in relief, "I'm so glad you're okay."

 _No, no, don't be nice to me. Yell at me, tell me you told me so._

He puts his hand gently over mine, wiping tears from his eyes with his other hand. He keeps smiling at me, "I was so worried about you."

 _Stop it, please. Be mean to me, tell me I deserved it._

Axel comes up and puts a hand on Roxas's shoulder, "Gave us quite the scare there, kid."

I shake my head weakly, it barely moves at all. _Don't be sympathetic, stop being nice!_

Roxas uses the hand that's not holding mine to ruffle my hair gently. Tears spill down his face and he laughs, "I'm going to kill that fucker for trying to kill you."

I want to cry, I want to scream at him to be mad at me. I try to talk again, but I still can't force words out my throat. Roxas shakes his head again, "Don't talk, Ven. You need to heal. The doctors were barely able to keep you alive. You've been in a coma for almost four months now. We were starting to think you wouldn't wake up."

 _That long.. Where is Vanitas then?_ He probably left the state, considering how he left me in that house. Roxas continues to ruffle my hair, "You're going to be okay. You can stay with Axel and I for as long as you need to. I'm here for you, I'm not going anywhere."

I look down, I can't look him in the eye, knowing his pain is all my fault. He stands, sighing, "Visiting hour is over. We'll be back tomorrow. Try to get some sleep. It'll help."

As he gets to the door I force out a broken "Rox..as.."

He turns back and smiles back, "I love you, Ven."

I'm left alone in the room and I stare at the white wall. _I don't deserve him_. Maybe this is good for me. I can start over again. I can make something of my life, find someone who might actually love me and have something beautiful like Roxas has with Axel. Maybe I can be normal and not feel like I'm always doing everything wrong. Maybe one day, I can forget all this and move on. Maybe, just maybe, I can forgive myself for what I put Roxas through. I'll never be able to look at people the same way. I'll never be able to trust people on a whim, not anymore. Vanitas was nice once, he was caring. He became someone I didn't know at all. How can someone just completely change like the flip of a dime like that? I'll never be able to look at someone without wondering if they're like Vanitas, too.

Vanitas ruined me. He ruined my trust and how much I can allow myself to love. But I only have myself to blame. I knew the warning signs, and I ignored them all. I put my brother through hell for no reason, I let myself dig my grave so deep I couldn't get out by myself. I almost died, because I ignored the help I desperately needed. I won't be like I was, and maybe that's a good thing. I'm going to move on now, I won't forget this, I will use it to make sure I don't fall victim again. Maybe one day, when I have someone as special and kind to me as Axel is to Roxas, I can truly forget Vanitas and what he did to me. Until then, he's my reminder.


End file.
